


Fear of the void

by ItzZaira



Series: The Dark Sanses [6]
Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Crosstale | XTale (Undertale), Anti-Void (Undertale), Comfort, Crying, Dark Sanses being Dark Sanses, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Flashbacks, Fluff and Angst, Forced God Of Destruction Errortale Sans (Undertale), Happy ending don't worry, How Do I Tag, Hurt/Comfort, I'm Bad At Tagging, I'm Bad At Titles, Just a bunch of traumatized skeletons, Memories, Nightmare Cares, Panic Attacks, Souls, Trauma
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-05
Updated: 2020-12-05
Packaged: 2021-03-10 01:26:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,871
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27842218
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ItzZaira/pseuds/ItzZaira
Summary: The white kept rising, rising, becoming more, thicker, it was overwhelming, just like the day. That day. The day XGaster destroyed his world, his home, everything, it hurt so much, the locket under his shirt was burning, his family screaming at him,he couldn't do this, it was too much and it just wouldn't stop-"Cross?"OrHow the gang found out Cross' deadly fear of white.No romantic relationships. Everything is purely platonic.
Relationships: Nightmare's gang - Relationship, No Romantic Relationship(s)
Series: The Dark Sanses [6]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1519565
Comments: 2
Kudos: 93





	Fear of the void

**Author's Note:**

> So, this sets time just a couple months after Cross joined the gang.

Maybe.. it would have been handy to mention the anti-void was literally a void of only white.. maybe it would have been handy to mention the screaming voices of Fate..

But the gang had assumed Cross already knew.

How stupid they were.

Cross was much younger then them, Cross was just a kid, not to mention, Nightmare _literally_ found him in a _white void._ How did he think Cross would be okay with this?

It had been a couple months since Nightmare had found the newest adition to their gang: Cross. The youngest Sans yet, maybe just a tiny bit older then Blueberry was, if not younger then him. The black and white skeleton was shorter then Ink was (he was _way_ too small, maybe just a tiny bit taller then Blueberry). The Sans was definitely almost a teen, if not a kid. ~~Probably a kid.~~

Nightmare had been lead to Xtale by Cross' negativity alone. All Nightmare had been able to feel from him was either emptiness, darkness, such negative thoughts worse then what he felt from most Sanses, sadness, ~~anger~~ , ~~self-hate~~ or sometimes, even thoughts of ending his life. Nightmare had been surprised Cross hadn't broken down yet.

He remembered what Cross' first reaction had been when he saw Nightmare. 

First nothing. An empty stare. Blinking. Nightmare didn't disappear. Why? Wasn't Nightmare some sick illusion of his mind?

But Nightmare had stayed. Convinced him he was real. The moment he had, Cross had finally broken down. Nightmare, having gained emotions thanks to taking care of Horror, Dust, Killer, Fresh or sometimes even Error, took him home, and protected and loved him as if he were his own son. Nightmare was glad he had found Cross in time. Since Ink hadn't done anything to help at all.

_Isn't Ink the creator? Why hadn't he done anything like he always did? What had he been thinking when creating that au?_

Not the point. 

The point was, Nightmare _should_ have known that bringing Cross to the _anti-void_ of all places after such short time, would be an horrible idea.

It all started that morning. Nightmare had just been talking about visiting Error in the anti-void, and Cross, who had been half asleep, ofcourse wanted to meet him too.

"But.. where does Error live?"

Nightmare started to explain. "We don't really know if its an au Error lives in- but Error lives in a sort of "timeline" called the anti-void, with a lot of voices screaming all the time."

Cross looked horrified. The others of the gang sighed. They had reacted the same way.

"But.. but why would he want to live there?! Can't he live with us?!"

"Already tried that." Nightmare sighed.

"Multible times." Horror continued, grabbing the used plates to wash them, walking away.

"He doesn't want to leave for some reason." Killer sighed, playing on his phone.

...

"Well.. we should visit him!" Cross smiled, making the others look up.

"I don't think thats a good idea-"

"Why not?" Said skeleton blinked. "He's lonely.. he always visits us anyway, why can't we visit him?"

"Cause the au we live in is a lovely home and Error lives in hell."

"Dust!"

"Its true!"

"Its not. Its just.. different.."

"You and I both saw the anti-void Killer!"

Nightmare sighed, annoyed, when Killer and Dust started arguing again. Couldn't they be silent for two minutes?

Cross looked at Nightmare with a pleading look in his eyes. From being alone so long in his own world, he didn't even want to think about Error suffering the same fate. He didn't deserve it! And besides, how bad could this "anti-void" be? It could never be as bad as his own world. They should let Error know they really love him like a family!

Nightmare looked at the small Sans, and sighed once again. "No."

"Plllleeeeeeaaaaaassssseeeee?"

"Cross, the anti-void is not a nice place." Nightmare tried to explain, but Cross cut him off.

"But then, why does Error live there?"

"We tried to get him to move here. He keeps refusing everytime for some reason." 

Cross pouted. But- but they couldn't just leave him there like that! Error deserved love too!

Nightmare was about to say something else, when Dust stopped him. "Come on, boss. Whats the worst that can happen anyway? Just a tiny bit of shock, thats it."

Nightmare looked unimpressed. "You were freaking out about how many souls there were to collect LV from."

"I was insane back then- I am fine now!" Dust defended himself. "Besides, Cross is much more stable then we are. And he's been here for months. Its better to see the anti-void now and get it over with then to shock him in an emergency."

Nightmare thought about that for a minute. That.. did make sense..

He looked at Cross' pleading face one more time, before he sighed in defeat. "Alright. We can go visit Error."

"YAY!!!!!" Cross cheered, spinning around himself. The others chuckled, finding that his childish behavior was adorable.

"Is anyone else wanting to join?" Nightmare doubted it, but it wouldn't hurt to check.

"No thanks. I'm good." Dust said without looking up, which make Killer roll his eyes. "I thought it wasn't "too bad"?"

"No. I said that the anti-void is not dangerous, its still hell." Killer rolled his eyes again.

"What about you, Killer?" Cross looked at Killer hopefully, and the older skeleton was going to hate himself for this, but..

"I'm sorry, Cross. I don't really like the anti-void.."

Cross pouted. 

HEY HORROR!" Dust yelled, finally putting his phone away. "WOULD YOU LIKE TO VISIT ERROR IN THE ANTI-VOID?"

 _"THE ANTI-VOID!?"_ Came a shocked yell back, before a pause.

...

"SURE!!!!"

"Yay!" Cross smiled once again. He looked over at Nightmare's worried face. And frowned. There was nothing to worry about! They would just visit Error!

Seriously, how bad could it be?

* * *

..............

This was the _last_ thing he had expected.

Looking over at the ghosty human child floating besides him, he could tell Chara was just as shocked as he was.

This.. _this_ was the anti-void?!

This au.. no, whatever this place was, felt so empty. Because it _was_ empty. The "air" felt so cold, as if it might freeze his soul, just like that, and his soul wasn't even here. 

Besides the strings that were hanging on the "ceiling" (seriously, what are those strings tied on?) along with the souls and dolls tied to the strings, there was absolutely _nothing._ Being soulless, Cross could feel the pleas of the souls hanging above, begging to be either freed or to be ended, just to _get out_ of this hell, as Dust had called it. It felt so cold, so negative, so sad, so.. so.. depressing..

Chara had pain in her eyes as she looked at the souls above. She wanted to help them so badly, but.. she couldn't do anything. This was her life now. Not being able to be seen by anyone besides Cross, heck, not even solid, watching as people got killed before her eyes.

_Why had Nightmare brought them back to their old au?_

Nightmare sighed at the shocked silence of the small skeleton, giving him a minute to progress.. this.. Horror looked understanding himself. He.. may have tried to cut the souls out the first time to eat them.. Dust had tried to kill the souls for more LV... they had been new, but still! 

Cross' reaction was the most normal.

Both were unaware of Cross silently having a panic attack.

_Why was he here? Nightmare said they were going to visit Error this isn't Error he can't possibly live here is Error trapped like he was? Had Nightmare finally gotten sick of him!? WAS NIGHTMARE BRINGING HIM BACK TO HIS AU?!_

Cross didn't have soul with him. Because of that, Nightmare couldn't him panicking right now..

_The familiar white was everywhere, it was too much, too much, too much, why was the white here why wouldn't it leave him alone?! Nightmare had saved him- he would be safe, he was safe, he had Nightmare and- where was Nightmare?!_

_Nightmare wasn't there. Horror neither. The blue strings and souls were gone._

_He was alone._

_Alone, in_ **_his_ ** _world, **his** au, or atleast, what **used** to be his au because there **used** to be people living here, this **used** to be a home to him- his brother, Papyrus, Undyne, Frisk, Alphys, Mettaton, Toriel, Asriel, Asgore- it was gone. Gone. Gone. Gone. Overwritten within seconds. Having lived in the underground- **genocide.** There had been a genocide, hadn't there? Yeah, yeah, the human ~~(what was their name again?)~~ , they had gotten killed and Chara- **Chara** took their place. Chara was forced to do genocide. ~~Sans~~ Cross fought the ~~anomaly~~ human, again, again, again again **again again again ~~again again again again-~~**_

~~"Cross?"~~

_He had been stabbed, hadn't he? Yeah, he had been stabbed. In his chest, ~~Sans~~ Cross knew. But before he had the chance to die, **Gaster** had taken his soul, **fused** it with ~~the fallen human~~ Chara's, and got rid of this world. Along with that, Gaster accidentally got rid of himself._

_He was trapped._

_Trapped._

_Trapped._

_Trapped._

_There was nothing but white, **white everywhere,** but no matter what he did, it just **wouldn't. Go. Away.**_

~~"Cross?"~~

_~~Sans~~ sucked in a deep breath, he couldn't breathe. He couldn't breathe he couldn't breathe- he was skeleton, why would skeletons need to breathe-? Did it matter, he just couldn't breathe and his chest became painfully tight- had Chara always been there? Oh, now she was screaming about how this was his fault and she was right-_

~~"Cross?!"~~

_There was nothing, nothing nothing nothing **nothing-**_

_Another painful gasp. Why couldn't he breathe, breathing was nice, he liked to breathe- ~~he couldn't save his family, he didn't deserve to breathe~~ why was breathing so hard?!_

_It was the white. It must he the white, this world, the white everywhere, it was too much, why wouldn't the void go away?!_

_How long had his family been there? Who knew, but they were screaming again. He felt something burn under his shirt. Oh. His locket._

_The white kept rising, rising, becoming more, thicker, it was overwhelming, just like the day. That day. The day XGaster destroyed his world, his home, everything, it hurt so much, the locket under his shirt was burning, his family screaming at him, **he couldn't do this, it was too much and it just wouldn't stop-**_

"CROSS!"

Cross finally snapped out of it when he heard the yell. He felt something wet trail down his face. With a hand, he touched his cheekbone. Was.. was he crying? Why was he crying..? 

Looking up hesitantly, his eyes widend to see Nightmare, Error (when had he come here?) And Horror looking at him, all looking incredibly worried.

He couldn't see the anti-void anymore..

Peaking from the corner of his eyes, he noticed Nightmare's tenticals surrounding him, blocking any of the voices or the void.

"Cross..? Can you hear me..?" Nightmare spoke extremely gently, but Cross just wanted to disappear. 

He wasn't a child, dang it! He could handle the anti-void! Which looked a lot like the au he had been trapped in for months-

He flinched, but nodded his skull at Nightmare's question. Tears blurred his vision, feeling shame grow in his soul. 

...

"Do you want to go back home..?" Nightmare asked carefully. This time, Cross forced himself to look up, being thankful that the other skeletons were blocking his view.

"B-but.. b-but w-what about E-Error-"

"ItS fiNe, K-kiDdo." Error smiled gently at him. "T-tHe anTi-v-vOid iS ScaRy. I-i'lL viSiT You n-neXt tIme."

But..!

...

".....okay.." oh great, he sounded like a child now. 

Horror walked behind Cross, apologizing under his breath as he covered both the small skeletons' eyes with his hands, before Nightmare pulled back his tenticals. He couldn't open a portal like that. After the portal was opened, Nightmare turned to Error. "Would you like to come aswel?"

Error grinned painfully. "C-caN't." He pointed at his chest- his soul. It hurt. There were too many au's.

Nightmare nodded in understanding. Gently pushing Cross towards the portal, the other three dark Sanses left.

* * *

...

That had been two hours ago. 

Cross had locked himself into his room before anyone could ask what happened. Cross didn't know himself.

Besides him, Chara looked unimpressed. "You had a panic attack, wasn't that obvious?"

"You had it too!"

"...atleast I can admit I had one."

"You don't have to face them." Cross pointed out, burrying his skull into his pillow. How was he supposed to explain _that_?

Would Nightmare lock him up back in his au? Would they leave him?! Would he be alone again?!

~~Would he lose his family again?~~

A gentle knock on his door made him flinch. "Cross?" It was Nightmare's voice once again, and Cross whined. He couldn't face them now... he would probably break down if he did..

...

Another knock. "Cross? I'm coming in, okay?"

...

The door was opened very gently, and Nightmare peaked inside. All off the lights were out, though he could see just fine. The room was tidy, like always, but Nightmare wasn't paying any attention to that. His attention was on the bed, where a certain X-themed skeleton was laying on his stomach, face hidden in his pillow. Nightmare frowned, closing the door.

"Cross.."

Cross didn't maken single sound. Nightmare wasn't really surprised as he walked towards the bed.

"..do you want to talk about it?"

...

Cross shook his skull. He knew he would cry if he tried talking. 

"Alright." Nightmare placed himself on the edge of the bed. "How can I help you?"

Not a single answer. Nightmare sighed.

"Cross.. I can't help if I don't know whats wrong.. please let me help you.."

...

"It reminded you of your old au, didn't it? The anti-void, I mean."

The flinch he got was enough answer.

...

"Cross-"

A sob cut him off, and Cross curled up, trying to keep silent. Nightmare shouldn't worry about him.

Nightmare got a concerned look in his eye. "Can I touch you?"

...

There was a slight nod. Cross finally looked away from the pillow, empty eye sockets staring at Nightmare's turquoise eye. Tears streaming down his face. 

Before he just hugged Nightmare around his chest, shaking. Cross burried his skull into the taller's shoulder, starting to cry. Nightmare's eye softened further, hugging him gently and rubbing his back. "Hey.. shhh.. you're not there anymore.." he coed softly. The smaller skeleton sobbed, cuddling closer. 

Nightmare frowned. He should have known. What else had he expected?

~~~

After a couple minutes, Cross had calmed down, still hicuping softly. He just didn't seem to be able to stop crying, he felt like such a child. He didn't move from his position. He was too comfortable to do so.

Nightmare only hummed, resting his skull on top of the other, rubbing circles between the smaller's shoulderblades to help him relax as a tentical gently petted him. Nightmare waited a moment, wanting to make sure Cross could talk normaly with him, before he spoke. "Are you feeling better?"

Cross hummed, relaxing against Nightmare. Nightmare sighed in response.

"..Cross. Do you fear the anti-void?"

Cross whined, hiding his face in the older ones chest, it was painfully obvious, why did Nightmare have to ask?

Probably because he wanted it confirmed.

...

"It... it reminded me of my au.. and when I.. I-I was trapped.." a full body shiver ripped through him, and his grip on Nightmare tightend as he hiccuped softly. Nightmare looked at him softly, before he sighed. Placing a gentle kiss on top his skull.

"Thats totally normal.." he murmured softly, continuing with the gentle touches. "After everything.. its totally normal that you would be scared of something like that.."

"B-but.." Cross sniffeled. "Who is afraid of the colour white-"

"Ink."

Cross looked surprised, looking up. Nightmare was chuckeling to himself. "Don't know why. But Ink hates blank or white spaces just as much as Error does."

That made him freeze. "....Error hates white spaces?"

Nightmare nodded. 

"...and.. it doesn't make him weak?"

"Ofcourse it doesn't.." Nightmare stared deep into Cross' eyes. "Being afraid is normal and fine.. after what happened with you, Cross, I would be surprised it you weren't."

Cross took a minute to progress. "So.. y-you won't put me b-back in my au..?"

So _that_ was what this was about.

"Oh Cross.." Nightmare pulled him closer, feeling Cross quickly snuggle against him. "Ofcourse not.. what makes you think that..?"

"B-because.. it makes me w-weak-"

 _"No."_ His voice became serious, almost scary like, which made the small skeleton flinch.

"Being afraid does not make you weak." Nightmare said sternly. "Especially something like that. Everyone has their fears, even Killer, even Dust, even Horror, even Fresh, even Error. Even you. Its normal. Everyone has their fears, and its nothing to be ashamed of. I would never put you back into your au, no matter what. We all love you, and want to help you as much as we can. Do you understand?"

...

Cross smiled shakely, eyelights finally returning as he leaned his skull against Nightmare's chest. "Yes dad.. thank you.."

Nightmare smiled gently, placing another soft kiss on his skull. "Ofcourse."

**Author's Note:**

> English is not my first language (or autocorrect ruins my life) so if you see any mistakes, please don't hesitate to tell me!


End file.
